Divorce can have devastating repercussions for children, spouses and loved ones. It can even have lasting health ramifications. One or both partners often feel their needs are being neglected by their partner(s).
Marriage counseling can be an effective way to address issues between partners and thwart divorce proceedings. Below are some suggestions for how to prevent one:
1. Seek Counseling
Counseling is an invaluable way of working through relationship issues and improving them, while at the same time avoiding negative feelings such as anger, frustration, sadness and loss that often accompany divorce proceedings. Many therapists also teach stress reduction techniques and strategies designed to keep couples together.
Individuals going through divorce often feel overwhelmed by their new lives, having to adjust to different routines such as grocery shopping alone or taking an unfamiliar route to work. All this change can add stress levels up, so consulting for divorce problems may provide assistance in how best to cope with stress levels and take control of life again.
Counseling for divorce problems is also an invaluable opportunity to gain a deeper understanding of the divorce process, including why your spouse may want out. A therapist can offer insight into your spouse’s mindset and offer advice on how best to approach dealing with it; additionally they can identify opportunities for growth within your relationship and create solutions to prevent future conflict.
Counseling for divorce problems can provide not only emotional support, but also help you understand the impact of separation on your children. This understanding allows you to make decisions that are best for both families, as well as devise a parenting plan consistent with your values and goals. In addition, counselors offer literature and resources about both short- and long-term effects of separation.
2. Share Your Needs
One solution to your divorce woes may lie within communication better with your partner. Instead of waiting until there’s an argument to discuss issues you both feel are crucial, sitting down together and discussing these topics will often bring solutions and strengthen relationships overall. Since emotions may make communicating effectively difficult at times, consider writing down all points you wish to address; this way you will remember them when emotions subside and details remain clearer in memory.
Many individuals going through a divorce experience feelings of grief and loss. If this is you, help may be needed in processing these emotions and finding ways to cope. A counselor or support group meeting could provide this much-needed therapy session; alternatively a professional psychologist may assist in understanding what went wrong in your relationship and how to avoid repeating its errors in future relationships.
Assisting a friend through their divorce requires being supportive and listening without judgment, rather than offering advice which could potentially be harmful to their mental wellbeing. Instead, focus on listening and validating their emotions rather than criticizing their former partner – that could push them away further in future discussions.
Some divorced friends may be experiencing difficulty managing both financial and logistical aspects of separation. Studies suggest that women may be up to three times more likely to live below the poverty line after going through a divorce than before it. Therefore, keeping communication channels open while offering help with tasks like packing for moving can make all the difference in outcomes.
3. Make Sex a Priority
Work pressures and family needs can have a devastating effect on sexual relations between couples, leading to decreased intimacy between partners. This can cause marital discontentment and ultimately divorce solutions being sought out by couples. Therefore, it is crucial for couples to prioritize sexual interactions as part of a happy marriage, making time just for each other and making sexuality a top priority in order to maintain it and prevent future divorce issues.
Those whose midlife marriages are on the brink of gray divorce have likely spent ample time visiting therapy offices to talk through hidden issues and emotional traumas that led to its demise, while at the same time challenging assumptions about pleasure and sex. These conversations could provide clarity into why your relationship broke down but may have also made you reconsider your thoughts on pleasure and sex in general.
4. Avoid Conflict
Anger and resentment are natural feelings during divorce proceedings, but avoiding conflict is the key to ensuring your settlement process goes smoothly. No matter if it involves custody or finances; prolonged negotiations only serve to extend and add more stress for both parties involved. Here are some strategies for minimizing conflict:
Fight wisely: Instead of engaging in every disagreement with your spouse during a divorce proceeding, focus on winning those that matter most and allow your solicitors to manage the rest.
Avoid Misusing Children as Witnesses: Do not badmouth your ex-spouse in front of your children as doing so may only add stress and could affect how they view either parent in the future. Furthermore, discussing your divorce with mutual friends who could pass along your words directly could prove damaging.
Rehashing the Past: Focusing too heavily on past wrongs that caused your marriage to end can create tension during a divorce, from cheating to spending habits or heated words exchanged in anger. Instead, look forward and don’t dwell on past hurts which led to its end.
Do not respond to hostile text messages and emails from your former spouse: doing so only escalates conflict and keeps you bound in a relationship that ended in divorce. Instead, seek professional advice from an attorney or, for emotional support purposes, from a therapist; having support networks during difficult times such as this is key; consider working with a mediator who will assist with finding fair solutions between all parties involved and could even reduce chances that one party gets better terms than others.
5. Forbid Divorce
Divorce can be an emotionally taxing decision for all involved, affecting family life as a whole and having lasting repercussions for children’s mental health. Furthermore, divorce breaks the natural law – God’s moral law. Scripture warns against those engaging in sexual immorality, theft, idolatry, revilers or drunkards from entering his kingdom (1 Corinthians 6:9-10), thus disqualifying them for inheriting His kingdom (1 Corinthians 7:26-27). Divorce breaks this rule and ends a marriage bonding.
Though God does not endorse divorce, He understands that human nature makes mistakes and that marriages will end. Therefore, He has created laws designed to protect spouses from abuse and ensure the safety of children if the married couple cannot find common ground on how best to resolve their differences. These laws should be strictly adhered to.
Some believe that God allows for any reason for divorce not mentioned in the Bible, such as an addict’s addiction or mental illness of one partner. But this may not always be the case; sometimes God allows divorce for reasons not listed therein, such as domestic violence or mental illness in one partner.